The family-integrated church is not a new phenomenon but deeply rooted in Reformation and Puritan thought, which saw intergenerational worship as essential to the covenant community. Historically, the people of God worshiped together, recognizing the significance of including children in corporate worship. This model honors the biblical call for families to worship as a unit but comes with challenges—especially in training children to engage with sermons. How can churches foster grace, love, and patience in this environment? How do we help parents train their children while encouraging others to show understanding?
This post draws from Reformed, Puritan, and modern authors to explore the importance of family worship and intergenerational community. With insights from works like Family Theology and resources from organizations like the National Center for Family Integrated Churches (NCFIC), we will present a gospel-centered vision for family-integrated worship, rooted in Reformed tradition and relevant for today’s church.
The Reformation View of Family Worship
One of the key contributions of the Protestant Reformation was the recovery of the doctrine of the priesthood of all believers, which emphasized the spiritual responsibilities of each household member, particularly fathers, in leading their families in worship. Reformers like Martin Luther and John Calvin not only reformed church practices but also placed great importance on the family as a central unit for spiritual growth.
Luther famously remarked,
“The house of every Christian is a little church, and the head of the household is the pastor of that church.”
He encouraged regular family devotions, seeing the family as vital for passing on the faith to the next generation. Calvin similarly emphasized including children in worship, writing,
“Let the children of the Church be admitted to hear the mysteries of Christ, and let them receive the sacred sign of the covenant, in order that, being grafted into the body of the Church, they may grow in faith and piety.”
In a family-integrated church, this Reformation principle finds full expression. Children are integral members of the covenant community and are expected to participate in worship from a young age. The Reformers’ emphasis on family worship serves as the foundation, encouraging parents to assume spiritual leadership both at home and in the church.
Puritan Insights on Intergenerational Worship
Building on the Reformation’s legacy, the Puritans were deeply committed to family worship and intergenerational discipleship. Richard Baxter, in The Reformed Pastor, famously described families as “the nurseries of the Church,” emphasizing that the home is the primary place where children are taught the faith. Fathers were urged to diligently instruct their children in Scripture and catechism. Baxter’s vision extended to church life, where he believed children should be present to witness the administration of the means of grace.
Jonathan Edwards, another key Puritan figure, echoed this sentiment, insisting that the entire family of God—including children—should be involved in corporate worship. He wrote,
“We are all bound to be present in the assembly of the saints, where God has promised His special presence, and where His Word and ordinances are administered.”
Modern family-integrated churches build on these principles, seeing Sunday worship as an opportunity for children to witness preaching, participate in singing, and experience the ordinances of baptism and the Lord’s Supper. Including children in worship reinforces their covenant identity and helps them understand what it means to worship God in spirit and truth.
Modern Reformed Perspectives on Family-Integrated Worship
Today, groups like the NCFIC champion family-integrated churches, advocating for intergenerational worship and family discipleship. Scott Brown, the founder of the NCFIC, argues in A Theology of Family that worship should involve entire families, and children should not be excluded from the life of the church.
“The family,” Brown writes, “is the primary training ground for the next generation of Christians, and the church is the place where families come together to worship and be strengthened in the faith.”
He warns against excluding children from worship, advocating for a church where families worship together and children learn from their parents and the wider community.
Family Theology emphasizes that the family is central to God’s redemptive plan and must shape our approach to church life. Parents are responsible for training their children in godliness, but the church also plays a vital role in supporting parents in this task.
Joel Beeke on Family Worship and Patience
Joel Beeke’s The Family at Church highlights how family-integrated worship aligns with the Reformed and Puritan tradition. Beeke underscores that family worship is crucial to discipling children in the faith, both in the home and in the church. He argues that fostering a spirit of grace, love, and patience in a family-integrated environment requires churches to support parents while cultivating an atmosphere where everyone, including those without children, practices patience.
"Family worship in the home is the first school of Christ, and corporate worship is the central school of the covenant community," Beeke writes.
In a family-integrated church, distractions caused by children should be seen as opportunities for the whole church to reflect Christ’s patience and grace.
Scott T. Brown: Practical Helps for Family-Integrated Worship
In The Family at Church, Scott T. Brown provides practical guidance for families and church leaders seeking to implement family-integrated worship. Here are some key takeaways:
1. Encouraging Fathers as Spiritual Leaders
Brown emphasizes the role of fathers as spiritual leaders, urging them to take an active role in their children's spiritual development. Churches can support this by providing resources such as family worship guides, Scripture reading plans, and devotional materials.
2. Structuring the Lord’s Day Around Worship
Brown advocates for structuring the entire Lord’s Day around worship, family discussions, and spiritual reflection. Churches can help by offering sermon discussion guides that families can use at home to reflect on the sermon and apply its teachings.
3. Training Children for Worship
Training children to sit still and participate in worship can be challenging, but Brown stresses that this training begins in the home. He encourages families to start with short worship sessions and gradually increase their length as children grow. Churches can provide resources such as quiet bags or children’s sermon notes to help keep young ones engaged.
4. Building a Culture of Multi-Generational Discipleship
Family-integrated worship fosters multi-generational discipleship, where children learn by observing their parents and older members. Brown encourages churches to facilitate opportunities for multi-generational fellowship, such as meals, Bible studies, or service projects.
5. Addressing Common Challenges
Recognizing the challenges of family-integrated worship, Brown suggests churches offer practical support for families, such as family-friendly seating areas and quiet activities for children during services. Importantly, churches should remind their congregations to extend patience and understanding to families training their children in worship.
Practical Advice for Parents
Training children to participate in worship takes time and effort. Parents can follow these steps to help their children engage in worship:
1. Start with Family Worship at Home
Regular family worship prepares children for corporate worship. Joel Beeke encourages families to make family worship a daily practice, reminding them that “the family is the first school of Christ.”
2. Set Clear Expectations
Children need to understand what is expected of them during worship. Encourage them to sit still, follow along with Scripture readings, and listen attentively to the sermon.
3. Be Patient and Consistent
Training children requires patience and consistency. Parents should expect setbacks and see these moments as opportunities for growth, much like sanctification itself is a process.
4. Model Worship
Children learn by example, so parents should model reverence and joy in worship. Actively engage with the sermon, sing wholeheartedly, and pray earnestly, showing children how to worship.
Encouragement for Non-Parents
For those in the congregation without young children, it can sometimes be difficult to remain focused during the service when distractions arise from nearby little ones. However, the Reformed tradition reminds us of the importance of extending grace and patience as we seek to build up the body of Christ.
1. Remember the Covenant Community
The covenant promises of God extend to all generations, and the presence of children in worship is a visible sign of God’s faithfulness. Richard Sibbes, a Puritan pastor, wrote, “Grace is that which is seen in families, descending from parents to children.” As members of the covenant community, we are called to support and encourage parents as they train their children in worship.
2. Practice Patience and Love
Paul’s exhortation in Ephesians 4:2-3 to be “completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love” applies to how we respond to the inevitable distractions in a family-integrated service. Just as God is patient with us in our spiritual growth, we are called to be patient with the children in our congregation as they learn to worship.
3. Offer Practical Support
If you notice a parent struggling with a restless child, offer a helping hand. Perhaps you can sit nearby to offer assistance or encourage the parent with a kind word after the service. Your support can make a significant difference in helping parents feel welcome and supported in their efforts.
Conclusion: Doing Life Together for the Glory of God
Family-integrated worship provides a unique opportunity to live out the gospel as we worship together, train children in the faith, and extend grace to one another. The Reformed heritage offers valuable insights for creating a church environment where all generations can worship together in unity.
As we continue this tradition, let us remember Psalm 145:4: “One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.” In doing life together, we embody the grace, love, and patience that Christ has shown us, and in turn, we extend that same grace to others as we build up His church.
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